Ahh well talked to jason quite a bit this morning. Well we have different ways of governing our lives and we thread different paths in life. Dun wanna talk about it here. Why? Cause i dun really got the mood anymore.
I like people to learn things by themselves without being taught. The rule of rugged individualism. I find it stays in the mind longer.
Put her name in my msn nick hopefully so she would notice and see what reaction it would cause. Stir some old emotions? Afraid not, only brought her anger. Asked me why i put her name there. Didn't tell her the reason but just changed it anyway. Maybe all these things are clouding my head too much. Maybe i find that we should't look so deep for reasons because reasons cause me heart ache. Every time i think of why she left me, the only reason i could think of was that she never really liked me. Although my whole heart i give to her, then and now. Some things never change, but some things do change. Maybe evading reasons, has been my way of hiding from the reasons, my way of running away. Having been losing sleep and losing my appetite more and more. Didn't eat anything today. Just didn't feel like having anything. Ever had those days?
Damn. Going to temple tomorrow with xiao zhang. Some things just got to be done. 2 years ago before my exam i went to the temple to pray. The first thing i prayed for was to pass my exams. The second i prayed for, was her to enter my life and stay there. Well, i never believed in these things, but then i wanted it so much. It was the only thing in life i have ever prayed for. I guess its the only thing in life worth praying for. My prayers were answered and we were together. Although not for a long time, but i still have haunting memories of every moment spent with her together. Well days passed and everything was forgotten... Over a year i never go return gratitude for my prayer. It's time i returned to offer my thanks for something given to me.
(0) So Waddaya Think!
10:43:00 AM